Both Lippy & Grumpy struggle with getting connected, with a combination of equipment failure (Grumpy) and user error (Lippy). Grumpy's prediction that Bernie Sander's mittens was the funniest thing of 2021 has been surpassed by a recording of a Handforth Parish Council planning meeting conducted over Zoom, which is funny and worrying at the same time. There are some similarities to an "The Office" style Australian documentary called  Rats in the Ranks, filmed in 1994.

We had a bit of a mistake ridden episode last week, Lippy was confused about days and time, Grumpy about whether Mombasa is a country or city and forgot to say thanks to a friend for some lovely feedback.

Grumpy congratulates himself on some epic editing and can now remove pauses, sniffs and heavy breathing.

Orange marshal 2 is, understandably, disappointed with not being able to order black pudding sausage rolls from the local butchers. Lippy's answer is to work from the butchers, although doubt is cast on whether they have wi-fi.

A massive missive from Davros this week and he suggests that Lippy should try cooking the Irn Bru haggis dish, which leads down a rabbit hole of, all thinks, pickles and the translation of cornichon. Quite rightly Davros points out that it's gone all quiet on the merch front. This is due to struggling to find a UK print on demand company and the difficulty of agreeing on design when we're not in the same room. He's quite keen for a branded dog whistle, among a number of unusual merch suggestions.

Thanks to screaming tomato, a Lippyisms web page is on it's way!

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Lippy has wrestled with a broken washing machine and managed to get it to the dump with a very minor injury.

Lippy attempts a dead cat strategy ahead of time and relays a lack of handbrake incident at the recycling centre. Top delivery by ao.com and a successful installation by Lippy and boyfriend of Lippy.

Grumpy's a bit shocked that a lady who used Gorilla Glue on her hair is contemplating suing Gorilla Glue because it didn't explicitly state not for use on hair. Grumpy then goes on a rant about health and safety and blame culture and confesses to a few incidents with superglue.

No work on the allotment, however some work on a new upcycled lamp.

Lippy seems to think you can be questioned by the police if you have a fresh haircut.

Lippy & Grumpy talk about some dead cat phrases including a friend known in her family as the Dorking Cat Killer. Grumpy explains the concept of the dead cat strategy, used in politics, business meetings and prosecutions. The best examples are normally demonstrated by children. We get perilously close to politics and manage to pull away from the brink.

Next up is the dead cat bounce, a phrase used by Wall Street to describe the action of a plummeting share. Lippy questions whether a dead cat would bounce and comes up with a experiment to test the theory. Off on a tangent, Grumpy explains a slow motion video he saw showing the deflection of a cymbal when hit with a drum stick and claims that validates the dead cat bounce analogy.

Lippy has a top tip and Grumpy not 100% in agreement. Grumpy's top tip involves some math and suspension of physics and, on reflection, is utter nonsense.