As holiday season approaches, dating apps see a surge in usage, with singles turning to platforms like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge for potential romantic matches. Yet, beneath the allure of festive flings, there’s a darker side to the dating app world: an addiction cycle akin to gambling, with platforms designed to keep users constantly swiping in search of “the one.” This setup, critics say, often leaves users trapped in a cycle of temporary highs, frequent disappointments, and, for some young men, a growing fatigue that’s driving them to take dangerous risks abroad.

Dating apps have been described as “dopamine slot machines,” exploiting users’ craving for connection through variable rewards that make matching and chatting an addictive experience. Users are constantly served new faces, profiles, and potential partners in an endless loop, much like a casino offering new games to keep players engaged. Each match or message delivers a quick dopamine boost, yet prolonged usage often leads to frustration, anxiety, and even burnout, leaving many men feeling fatigued, especially as the pressure to find someone intensifies during the holiday season.

For men under 30, this mounting frustration has driven some to explore alternatives beyond the Western dating scene, including joining the “Passport Bros” movement. This trend, growing popular on social media, sees men traveling overseas—often to developing countries—in search of relationships with women they feel are more traditional or less influenced by Western dating dynamics. But what begins as a seemingly romantic adventure can carry dangerous, even deadly, risks.

In recent cases, young men traveling overseas have found themselves targeted in “honeytraps”—scams where they are lured into romantic or sexual encounters only to be robbed or, in some tragic cases, killed. Reports of men being drugged and assaulted, sometimes with just a small amount of toxic substances such as a £6 drug that can be rubbed into the skin, have raised alarms among experts who warn that these “passport adventures” are not just misguided but potentially fatal.

The allure of escaping the dating app burnout and the perceived challenges of the Western dating scene, particularly in holiday months when loneliness and expectations peak, is leading young men down a dangerous path. And with the added risk of exploitative encounters abroad, experts suggest that rather than chasing an illusory dream, singles may need to rethink their reliance on both apps and “passport romances.”

Ultimately, critics argue that the real change needs to come from within the dating app industry itself. If platforms shifted focus from maximizing screen time and engagement to fostering meaningful connections, perhaps the pressures and dangers faced by young men seeking love, at home or abroad, might diminish.

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