The people we meet in our life sojourn have a specific role to play in our lives. To teach us lessons that we need to learn in order to evolve and grow as humans. Pain they say, is a teacher. Your ex doesn't always have to be the villain(well except for cases of abuse). They are wonderful people in themselves because at some point, we shared a beautiful part of our life with them - the pleasant memories and the support system. The problem here is that most people do not come to terms with the fact that nothing is permanent in this life. Human love is frail. Somethings aren't just meant to be and it requires a mental upgrade to understand that we probably have different directions in life. The mistake most people make after a break up especially one that was painful is that, we refuse to take time to heal. I know it may seem difficult to let go of a relationship where you may have invested so much of your self, energy and time in, to no avail, but what's even worse is going into a new relationship with old baggages. You shouldn't go into new relationships with old wounds so you don't bleed on the people who didn't even hurt you. I feel if you haven't completely healed, then you don't have any business being in a relationship. Relationships are not rehabilitation centers. Learn to appreciate the single life and enjoy yourself while at it so you can add value in subsequent relationships and partnerships going forward. Remember, time heals. Be grateful for the lessons and have also the courage to enjoy newness in its entirety and wholeness. Try not to dilute the new, with the savour of the old. Take your time to heal, forgive yourself and move on.